She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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