so explain again why im purple
no
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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