I am in a vortex of obligation.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
