Just mADE A PArabola og urine
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
