its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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