That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
