with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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