This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
