Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
