Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
