How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
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