no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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