dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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