She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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