I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
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