He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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