OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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