Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
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Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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