I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i came on her dog
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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