what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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