i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize
