i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Come see our sink grown plant.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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