We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
