so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize