you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
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When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
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Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize