Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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