fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
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