I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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