So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
