another moral hangover. fuck.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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