Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize