Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Just cropdusted the office
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
