I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I am available for nakedness
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.