Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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