Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
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I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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