thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
