But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
