he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
