Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
