I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
