Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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