He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
