11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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