No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Randomize
