; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize