My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
