Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
