Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
