Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
