At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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