# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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