the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
