I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
